Valentynsdag en “50 Shades of Sin”

50 dollars not 50 shades

Ek plaas graag hier onder ‘n baie relevante artikel van Christian Action, met erkenning aan die bron.

Sien ook,

a. die volgende onderhoud wat gevoer is oor p*rnografie, om te sien hoe ver ons samelewing geval het om immoraliteit te probeer ‘normaliseer’ (ons is dankbaar vir ds. Hannes Noeth se getuienis midde die moeilike situasie),

b. en hierdie artikel om te sien hoe ook in die ‘kerk’ immoraliteit goedgepraat word:

How to dump your wife and keep your ministry

Mag ons hemelse Vader in Christus ons genadig wees midde sy regverdige oordeel.  Mag gereformeerde gelowiges uit genade, deur die geloof in Christus lewe, midde ons doodsvyande se geweldige aanslae (die eie sondige hart, wêreld en die Satan, sien HK So.52), met HK Sondag 41 as ons raamwerk (sien ook die volgende preke: Should Christians watch Movies?; Sodom en ons, asook tegnologiese hulpmiddels om Rom.13:14 na te jaag – God se Tegnologie)

The Truth About 50 Shades of Grey

Ster Kinekor in South Africa is promoting the soon-to-be-released Fifty Shades of Grey film as “the hottest cinema experience this Valentine’s Day”(14 February), to which you can “treat your date”! Pro-family groups however, are warning that Fifty Shades of Grey is one of the worst pornographic glamorisations of sexual violence to be released on the big screen and have launched campaigns to expose this.

The mass media and throngs of women are swooning over the twisted “love story” “Fifty Shades of Grey,” but this cultural phenomenon’s impact on society will serve only to glamorize sexual violence and romanticize domestic abuse.

Reality of Abuse
While millions of women are fantasizing about the controlling and abusive Christian Grey of fiction, there are many other women dealing with the horrors of actually living with men like him.

In the book, and now the soon-to-be released film, Christian Grey uses manipulation, jealousy, intimidation and violence to control the naive Ana. Most fans overlook and romanticize this because of his powerful position, handsome looks and nice suits. But in real life women like Ana will tell you that a seemingly perfect exterior does not necessarily mirror one’s psychological health, or mean that he possesses a moral compass.

Portraying the Abuser as a Victim
A college student, one of many I’ve heard from in my role as executive director of the National Center on Sexual Exploitation, wrote to me that Christian is just suffering the consequences of his own abuse, acting out in the only way he knows, and that Ana’s patient, loving behavior helps him overcome his abusive tendencies. Christian is so easily and quickly forgiven for his violent behavior. But forgiveness and devotion to an aggressor who inflicts violence is not sexy. Violence is violence. Sexual violence is worse.

While this should be a black-and-white truth, E.L. James is selling it in all shades of grey. Even worse, over 100 million women are buying it — in over 50 languages.

Sensationalized Lie
The reality is that, if you take away the glamour, “Fifty Shades” is just a sensationalized lie, telling women that they can, and should, fix violent and controlling men by being obedient and devoted, and that, somehow, this is romantic. It is no surprise that Hollywood is betting millions of dollars that now is the right time to offer sexual abuse and sexual violence against women as mainstream entertainment.

Rape Porn
The popularity of “Fifty Shades of Grey” among women also sends a message to men that unrestrained domination is what women want. And, educated by porn, they know how to do it. A majority of men have been getting a regular diet of this kind of violent sex and degradation through porn for years. In it, women are tied up and treated like animals and objects. Much of it is rape-themed.

One of the most popular BDSM (bondage, discipline, sadism and masochism) websites advertises its content as “the sexual persecution of women and young teenage girls.” Ana Bridges, a researcher at the University of Arkansas, conducted a study that found that 89 percent of the most popular porn scenes involved violence, most of which was directed at women by men.

Unrealistic Fairy-Tale Ending
Porn will show you that women enjoy torture and violence, and now “Fifty Shades” is tacking on an unrealistic fairy-tale ending, convincing droves of women that this type of relationship is normal, and that they should just give in.

This is not entertainment, or a fairy tale, as Hollywood is claiming. This is glamorization of violence and abuse. Society pays a price when we teach men to be turned on by women in pain. As a result, sexual violence is on the rise in our military, colleges, families and on the street. When violence is made to be sexy, it is no wonder that these are the consequences.

Speak Up

It is time we speak up and stop obscuring the facts by allowing pornographers, like “Fifty Shades” author E.L. James, to lure us into viewing this lifestyle as attractive, harmless and empowering.

The National Center on Sexual Exploitation has a website,, that details 50 problems with this disturbing trend in entertainment media. This project comes in an effort to educate the public on how sexual exploitation affects society on both individual and public health levels. The site also features the #50DollarsNot50Shades campaign and urges patrons to support survivors of abuse and help educate the public on the realities of “Fifty Shades” relationships.

Reject Porn
Hold up a mirror to Christian Grey and you’ll see the reflection of a culture saturated in exposure to violent pornography. This is the porn that has, and continues to, groom the next generation of men to believe that they are entitled to violent sexual behavior, and that women should enjoy it. “Fifty Shades of Grey” models and reinforces this, while Hollywood is cashing the check. We will not accept what Hollywood is offering.

Glamorizing sexual abuse is not an appropriate topic for entertainment. Remove the glamour and facade of the Christian-Ana relationship and ask yourself if this is the twisted lie you want to tell yourself, your daughter and your friends.

Dawn Hawkins,, 5 February 2015.

Dawn Hawkins is executive director of the National Center on Sexual Exploitation. Her organization exposes the seamless connection between all forms of sexual exploitation. Find her group on Facebook. Follow them on Twitter@porn_harms.

What You Can Do

  1. Inform and warn friends and family. Urge them to boycott the film and not to purchase the novel. Share this article on your social media. Encourage them to rather donate R80 to a Christian shelter for abused women, than to waste R80 on a movie ticket.
  2. Post a polite, factual but firm comment on the Ster Kinekor Theatres and Nu Metro Facebook pages to protest this 50 Shades of Abuse! Use points made in the article above.
  3. Copy your complaint in an email to Ster Kinekor:
  4. Ask Exclusive Books to remove the 50 Shades of Grey book from their shelves: The General Manager:, 011 – 798 0166.
  5. Complain about the low age restriction given to this film (16LNS). Whilst we don’t think anybody should subject themselves to this film, at the least it should receive an X18 rating – i.e. only allowed to be sold from a porn shop. Contact the Film and Publications Board:

Cover 3d - medium

Recommended Resource
This is a winnable war. Is there hope for the porn addict? What is the Biblical antidote to the porndemic? And what can you do to protect yourself and your family? How can we take back the culture from the pimps and pornographers? Africa Christian Action’s book Porndemic will equip you, with the help of God, to begin to transform your community.

View an interview with the author here.

You can view the PowerPoint A Winnable War on slideshare.

Available from Africa Christian Action

This256-page book (with 22 infographics and 23 pro-family action pictures)is available from Africa Christian Action for R85 (plus R10 for postage within SA, therefore the Total is R95. Postage is R30 if you want it sent as a parcel, with tracking number. Total would be R115.).Contact 021 – 689 4480 or to order.

“Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.” Ephesians 5:11

Africa Christian Action
PO Box 23632
Claremont 7735
Cape Town South Africa
Tel: 021-689 4481
Join us on Facebook and Twitter

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